Thurrott Daily: December 26

Posted on December 26, 2016 by Paul Thurrott in Mobile with 21 Comments

Thurrott Daily: December 26

Things I will never need again, part 127

A special “all quips” version of Thurrott Daily. Because the holidays.

12/26/2016 3:12:54 PM

Note: Something tells me that this will be a slow week, full of end-of-year retrospectives and not much else. On that note, here are some headline riffs instead of the usual blurbs. Lazy? Perhaps.

“Microsoft Receives Overweight Rating from Morgan Stanley”

Two words. “Low carb.”

“New MacBook Pro not recommended by Consumer Reports”

Two things.

1. LOL

2. And not for any of the reasons I outline here. Amazing.

“How To Make Windows 10 Look Like Windows XP”

The crucial issue of our age.

“Microsoft Wants Its Next Windows Phone to Invent a New Category”

A phone that can’t make phone calls?

“Alcatel Idol 4S with Windows 10 coming soon to Europe”

Definitely the only thing that was holding it back.

“The New Official Lumia Support App for Windows Phone Is Available for Download”

I assume it provides emotional support.

“Did Microsoft just hint the Surface Phone will launch at MWC 2017?”

No, they did not.

“Spotify For Mac Brings Touch Bar Support For The New MacBook Pro”

Finally, a reason to spend that $2800.

“This father built his son an Apple II out of gingerbread”

Does it work? No? Then your website is absurd.

“The Company That Was Supposed to Be a Google-Killer Has Called It Quits”

I’m surprised Apple just gave up like that.

“Apple removes products from store amid patent war with Nokia”

If Nokia gets its way, that product will be “iPhone.”

“17 Hidden Apple TV Features You Should Know”

A product like Apple TV should have zero hidden features.

“Why Apple Is the Most Perfect Investment for 2017”

Not for the grammar, apparently.

“CyanogenMod is why I exist today”

Your parents will be so happy to hear that.

“You just got a new Windows phone! Here’s how to get started”

Step 1: Return/exchange it immediately.

“Growing number of Pixel owners are experiencing a wide range of issues”

Could you be more specific?

“5 tips for getting the most out of your fitness tracker”

1. Get off of your ass so it has something to track.

“Uber replaces “where to?” with “who to?””

I see no issue with them constantly changing the UI.

“Use Your Chromebook To Enable Google Play Music Yule Log”

Yes, that’s pretty much what it’s good for.

 

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Comments (21)

21 responses to “Thurrott Daily: December 26”

  1. 5496

    THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH WINDOWS PHONES.

     

  2. 332

    Gold , made my after christmas reading

  3. 185

    Is that a stock photo or did you take that picture in 1992?  I have a box full of those templates and other pre-visio memorabilia.

  4. 5516

    Well now I'm inspired. Next Christmas I'm building my children a TRS-80 Model 1 out of gingerbread.

  5. 1567

    haha good stuff, now off to buying a Lumia 950 xl... :P

  6. 5714

    Consumer Report's wildly differing battery life numbers can only mean one thing...  They completely suck at testing laptop battery life...  THERE IS NO OTHER EXPLANATION!

  7. 5592

    “Microsoft Wants Its Next Windows Phone to Invent a New Category”

    A phone that can’t make phone calls?

    Oh, please. Let's, for once, give Apple credit where they deserve it and actually DID create a category and not just popularize an already existing one. 

    Apple not only created the "Phone that Can't Make Phone Calls" category but owned it for years with the iPhone 4 and iPhone 5 families.

     

  8. 214

    LOL. Think I've got some templates here in a drawer next to an old package of Letraset...

    Can't bring myself to toss em' :-)

  9. 2091

    Ha, love it! Classic short takes

  10. 218

    I've kept my flowchart template and print spacing ruler from my COBOL programming days in the 80's.  No use for either just kept them in my "stuff" drawer along with the brochures for my old DEC Rainbow 100 and the various windows mobile and windows phones I've had over the years.

  11. 8032

    Step 1: Return/exchange it immediately

     

    Comments like this just proves that Thurrott Premium is not worth it. I'm looking to get an Elite X3 soon and my Lumia 950 has been great. It's good for some people which Paul just doesn't see. Sure I can't use Snapchat but times have had to message pictures of my junk are equal to zero.

    • 5812

      In reply to jlv632:

      Your point of view represents a tiny fraction of the phone user base and even a small part of Paul's user base. Apps are important to most people. To the tiny few that they are not will be happy with almost any phone. A Blackberry with BB10 would be fine for those people as well. Don't blame Paul for the facts.

       

      Facts.

      The market has spoken. Apps are important. The platforms that have the apps own 98+ % of the global phone market.

  12. 206

    So funny, my IBM Flowchart template is hanging up on my cube wall!

  13. 2068

    “Use Your Chromebook To Enable Google Play Music Yule Log”

    "Yes, that’s pretty much what it’s good for."

     

    This works too

     

  14. 9518

    >>“You just got a new Windows phone! Here’s how to get started”

    Step 1: Return/exchange it immediately.

     

    When I saw the original headline my 1st thought was that it implied as a gift -- if someone shot video of the unwrapping, might just go viral.

  15. 1775

    >Things I will never need again, part 127

    Wow, that takes me back.  I used those back in high school and college when I was learning Fortran and COBOL.

    >“Why Apple Is the Most Perfect Investment for 2017”
    >Not for the grammar, apparently
    <Cough!>

  16. 5539

    “The New Official Lumia Support App for Windows Phone Is Available for Download”

    I don't see it in the store. Must be just Android and iOS.

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